My 4th of July

I was debating on whether to post this or not, but I just decided to go for it and be transparent.

I went to visit my parents for part of this week and things have been fine. I got a few scrapbook pages done and a few cards, which was nice! My boys have had a fun time hanging out with NaNa & Pa Pa, although they have been on a sugar high -- but not as bad as it usually is. I seemed to have cut it off this time at least a little bit!

Anyway, today we went to the town where I grew up for their celebration. It's a little thing a bit bigger than the Pecan Fest with some neat booths and some neat games. We got there about lunch, so we grabbed something to eat and we headed to some games for the kids.

We were standing in line and Tresa (our friend) said, "Hey, there's Jason." Jason is the baby I had when I was 17. I turned around and he was standing right behind my boys!! I'm telling you, if I had my camera, it would have been the PERFECT picture!!

He is 12 years old and as tall as I am!! He is very tall and skinny. As I looked at him, I realized that I've always thought he looked like his dad, but today he looked like a good mixture of us both. He talks like his dad and has his blonde hair and blue eyes. I just couldn' get over how tall he was!

I don't really know the feelings that were going through my head at that point. It's all pretty weird. I know who he is, but does he know who I am. I saw his mom later and she talked to me for a few seconds. Nothing big, just how is everybody. . . yes, that too is a little weird at times.

Later, I took the boys swimming and after that, we went back to the food booths. I look over 1 table and there he was sitting!! I tried to sneak a picture of him using Tresa's camera, but I wasn't successful. I think that's ok, though.

Tresa did tell me a few things about him. He plays baseball and he plays first base. I played softball and played first base. His dad played baseball, but wasn't very good at it. She also told me that he is very good at football, which his dad was, too.

I just can't describe how I feel about it all. I'm very blessed that I get to see him and that I got to see him today. Part of me wants to see him as my son, although I love him different than my two boys. I know them and I only know very little about him. On the other hand, I'm so proud of him and how he's turned out. Today when I looked at him, I thought, "I could have done it. I could have raised him." But, very quickly the Lord corrected me. . . again, I knew I had made the right decision.

Anyway, I just had to share that!!

My boys, on the other hand, had a BLAST!! We went swimming and they had a waterslide, which Payton LOVED, but Evan climbed it at least 7 or 8 times and then decided not to go. Payton also went off the diving board. He even went off of the high dive!! I told him to put on Evan's floaties to go off of the high dive because you go under farther than you think. He got up there and quickly jumped towards the side. When he came up, I told him that he had to jump straight out and not sideways, but he looked at me and said, "But, mom. It was so scary! I just had to jump!" I remember several times being on that exact high dive at his age and turning around and walking back down because I was scared, but I told him over and over how proud I was of him for just jumping even when he was scared -- that's a sermon in itself speaking straight to me! We got pictures with Tresa's camera of it all and I'll post a few of those when I get them from her.

We went to Gary & Tresa's for supper -- it was awesome! Then we headed home to do a few fireworks. Can I just say that I hate fireworks! That should have been on the 100 things list! When I was 6 years old, I was holding a Roman Candle (which says not to on the package). The first ball went off as normal, but the next 5 came out the back and hit me in the chest. It burned my chest pretty bad and sparks flew in my eyes, so they were hurting for days. It was pretty scary -- so scary that I can remember it like it was yesterday -- where I was, who was first to get to me, how shocked I was, the pain the next day. . . anyway, we let the kids do a few fireworks the other night at my sister's house. Payton would run out and light them and then run away! I'm amazed at how fearless he is! Evan only liked the popper things you throw on the ground and the sparklers.

Well, it's raining here and my parents have dial-up, which is extremely slow. It's also almost midnight and we're getting up in the morning to head home for Aaron's birthday! I can't believe he's going to be 30! Please pray for me tomorrow -- remember in my list about how I go to sleep in the car!! On the way up here, I stocked up on snacks and when I felt myself getting sleepy, I started eating. . . not sure it was a good trade, but we got here ok!!